I have never had much success at fasting over the years. Even in the zeal of my youth, I could not even live up to the minimal requirement of 2 small meals and 1 normal sized meal for Ash Wednesday and Good Friday. It was not until Ash Wednesday of last year that I was able to maintain a fast through a whole day. I simply asked God to help me, and he gave me the strength to see it through. Unfortunately, I had no such success the following Good Friday.
Ironically, it has been my failures at fasting which have taught me an important lesson. Fasting is not meant to be an exercise of will power and self-control. Rather, there is a more spiritual meaning behind this traditional Lenten practice which yesterday's daily readings illumine for us.
The first reading is from the prophet Isaiah (Is. 58: 1-9). The people are lamenting that God is not taking note of their fasting. In their minds, because they have succeeded at keeping the letter of the law, God is now somehow in their debt. As the prophet puts it, "They ask me to declare what is due them." But God replies that the fasting he desires is one that brings liberty to captives. We should go without food not to feed our egos but to share what we have with the poor and hungry.
I have always found this scripture passage daunting. Who could I liberate from the yoke? I don't know anyone who is bound unjustly, and I have never had the misfortune (or fortune) of running into someone who was naked and in need of my cloak. In fact, I don't even have a cloak! But the message of this reading is that our fasting, if it is to be pleasing to the Father, must give us a heart more sensitive and compassionate to those who go without food out of poverty and want. Every day in our world there are those who do not eat so that there will be enough food for their children. Even worse, there are those who must decide which of their children they will feed on a given day. If our fasting does not connect us with them, then we are wasting our time.
If Isaiah gives us the horizontal axis of fasting (love of neighbor) then the gospel (Matt.9: 14-15) gives us the vertical axis (love of God). We fast because our bridegroom, Jesus, is no longer among us. Going without food teaches us that our true hunger is for Christ and increases within our heart a longing for his return in glory. The rumbling of our belly is easily settled with a morsel of food. But the rumbling of our heart continues throughout our lives until we are united with our Savior. This is the meaning behind the Church precept that we fast one hour before receiving the Eucharist. First of all, it focuses our attention on what it is we are about to do. Secondly, it reminds us that we do not live on bread alone, as Jesus famously told Satan in the desert, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God. Not only must fasting connect us more closely to our brothers and sisters who are in pain, but it must train our hearts to yearn for the fulfillment of all our desires, our bridegroom, Jesus Christ.
The spiritual purpose behind fasting can be lost on our weight conscious culture with its constant dieting and eating disorders. Fasting can be thought of as just another way of losing weight and looking better. On the other hand, our overabundance can lead us to forget that no amount of material possessions can give us meaning or quell the anxieties of our hearts. The discipline of fasting can not only teach us to control ourselves but to rely more on God for our needs. Then we will be free to give more generously to the poor. And God's promise through the prophet Isaiah will be realized among us:
Your light will break forth like the dawn,
And your wound will be quickly healed.
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